If a couple have been together for a long time and things are a little dull in the bedroom department, or maybe they’ve been together just a short while but want to broaden their horizons, then there are activities they can engage in that are a little left-of-centre.

Light B&D (or bondage and discipline) can be a way to explore each other’s fantasies in the safety and comfort of their own home. Rape fantasies, like anal play, are considered taboo, but many females harbour them, afraid of saying anything. Perhaps start with blindfolds and see how she feels, then progress to having her hands, then feet tied. Perhaps tie her feet apart, or experiment with bondage so that her legs can be tied open and apart. Sex shops often sell products that can be used safely.

If he fantasises about being tied up, it can be just as daunting for him to mention it, for fear of being laughed at. But again, experiment a little and see what works for the both of you. She might find she enjoys dominating her male partner, and he enjoys being the submissive (also called Ds play, for Dominant and submissive).

With any kind of BDsM play, a safe word is imperative – something that is not used often in every day language but when used during play, means “Stop now.”